Denese Peebles

Denese Peebles, you are cute, cute, cute, no doubt about it! You are HOT! And your birthday is Sunday, July 19! Happy Birthday!
Thank you! I’ll be 53.

Nooooo!
Yes! In fact, I recently wrote a piece for Bazooka called I am 50 and Fabulous.

You are most definitely 50 and Fabulous. What’s your secret? You look SO YOUNG!
You know, some people think men become distinguished and women just get old. I never bought into that. This is just me. I like dressing up. I love jewelry.

I think that when you decide you’re old, then you get old. I like me better now than I’ve ever liked me before. I know who I am and what I like. It’s all about me. This is my time. There’s something about being menopausal - I just don’t take shit anymore.

Woo-Hoo! I hear ya, sister! That must come in handy with your work for Kentucky Legal Aid. Tell us about that.
We assist and enable low income families, elderly, disabled and other vulnerable individuals in Western Kentucky to resolve legal problems that are barriers to self sufficiency, and to provide these individuals an opportunity for an improved quality of life. I’m a legal assistant. I primarily help with uncontested divorces.

Meaning both people want the divorce?
Yes, more or less. One party may not want the divorce, but there’s really no choice. For example, I had a sweet kid come in the other day. His wife just walked out on him and their little baby boy. So we’ll help him with legal representation. Other cases involve abuse of some kind, which is always hard, but, in the end, we can help make life better for the survivors.

So you love this work?
It’s rewarding in a lot of ways. We help a lot of people, and they come out better than if they had no help at all. Plus, I like to argue. I should have gone to law school!

A lot of your cases involve abuse of some kind. What’s up with that? Why aren’t folks sweet to each other?
It starts at a young age, I think, when children see abuse among their parents — or experience abuse, themselves. But it’s not just that. It can really happen to anyone. I was raised, in a very happy family to be a strong, independent woman. And it even happened to me. Nobody is immune.

Wow. What happened in your case?
It was in my second marriage. Women, in general, are raised to be such people pleasers. And abusers know your weaknesses. They’ll work to alienate you from your family and friends. They’ll say things like, “If you really love me, you’ll just want to be with me.” And I just changed. I remember my mom saying that she didn’t know if she was ever going to get her little girl back.

What happened?
Well, I have a beautiful daughter, and it wasn’t what I wanted her to grow up in. The one thing I learned was you need to keep your friends close. They’ll be there when no one else is. A girlfriend is one of the best things you can have. That’s why we started A Community of Women (CoW).

Yes! Tell us more about CoW!
We’re a 501c3 group of women embarking on a journey of hope. We strive to bring women together to realize the dream that we are each other’s greatest asset. We work to raise awareness around issues that deeply affect women — not just domestic violence, but breast cancer, body image issues, and just bringing women together to let them know they are not alone. We meet monthly to discuss issues and offer support, and we do fundraisers.

So women reading this who want to learn more about CoW?
They’re welcome to come to our meetings! Our next one is 5:30 p.m., Thursday, Aug. 13, at Etcetera Coffeehouse. We meet the second Thursday of each month.

And you have a fun event coming up!
Yes, we’re having a Masquer-aid Bash in October to raise funds for Guardian Family Services Center (domestic violence) and Susan G. Komen for the Cure (breast cancer). We’re inviting artists to create masks to enter in our Masquer-aid Masq contest, and then we’ll auction them off.  Everyone needs to check out our MySpace page, which we will keep updated on the date, location and other details about the event.

You, Lauren Adams, and Landee Bryant are the judges we have so far!

Yes, I’m excited to be in such good company! So if artists want to participate?
The guidelines are on our our MySpace page or they can send an email. The top 12 masks will be featured in our 2010 calendar along with the artists’ names and galleries. The deadline for entries is August 24.

Right on! So Denese, you and I first met during The Vagina Monologues a few years ago. What do you love about that show?
I love the show because there are so many wonderful parts for women to explore. And I think it’s important to bring violence out into the open and empower women to talk about their stories and to learn from each other.

I am so amazed by women. And why so many are not in awe of themselves just floors me. We have such capacity. We can give life. We have the capacity for love beyond limits. We have the strength to hold a family together whether they are by blood or by choice. Women are amazing.

Women rock. I love being one.
Me too!

And you’re involved in another women’s group in Metropolis, yes?
Yes, I’ve been a part of Zeta Zeta for 15 years now. We’re a community service organization — we do an annual Easter egg hunt, Thanksgiving baskets for those in need, we adopt families at Christmas, we donate to worthy groups. We also help during the Superman Celebration and at various concerts at Harrah’s. 

So you are always surrounded by a posse of beautiful women. But you’re totally looking for a man.
Yes! Some people assume I’m a lesbian — the short haircut, the women’s issues. And I have many wonderful lesbian and gay friends. But I’m straight. Heck, I’ve been married three times!

Wow, are you open to Husband No. 4?
Hah! My mom always said there’s not a house built big enough for me and a man. But I’m ready to try again. I think it’s meant for people to share. My daughter, Kyla, came from my first marriage. My second marriage was very short and very bad, as I mentioned before. And my son, Tre, came from my third marriage. His dad and I are still good friends. He was a lousy husband, but I was probably a lousy wife.

I’m sure you were a lovely wife! What kind of guy are you looking for?
Brains and a sense of humor. You have to make me laugh and be able to carry on a conversation. I like to discuss everything: politics, spirituality. I love to debate. If you can make me laugh, you’re in.

What do you do just for you?
I love to cook. I’m famous for my chicken spaghetti — everyone loves it.

What’s your recipe?
It’s really easy. It’s Mexican Velveeta, cream of mushroom soup, mushrooms, cilantro, chicken, onion, a little milk and thick spaghetti noodles — not the thin stuff.

Like how much of each?
Well, that’s the thing. I don’t do amounts. I just sprinkle. Four fingers of this — a pinch of that! So everyone always whines that theirs doesn’t taste like mine!

Hah! Your secret recipe is a secret even to you!
Yes, I guess so!

OK, so back to how it is that you look so very HOT. Come on, spill!
It’s meditation. I meditate every day.

Meditation?
Yes, and I’m a Reiki Master.

OK, now we’re getting to it. A Reiki Master?
It’s a Japanese technique that promotes healing. It’s based on the idea that an unseen “life force energy” flows through us. It has to do with energy being transferred from one person to another. We have seven main chakras or energy centers — you stop at each one and bring light into yourself. You make yourself a conduit for energy.

It helps to ground me. I can find a center. A peace.

I’m in! I’m going to start meditating right after this martini. Peace out, Denese!

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